As I am learning what my own teaching style is, I try to give myself feedback after every class about what I didn't say, and also what I can do better. I try to always ask if people are working with any injuries. I also try to assist people with their asanas by doing various things. So in honor of the Summer Solstice, I am reflecting about my "bad assist", with the knowledge that talking about it will bring new thoughts to light.
Since starting teaching, I had used my hands on people only to bring their awareness a certain part of their body. Usually you can bring your hand over to a part of their body, and the student will get their alignment straight using their own senses.
But for one class, I decided I needed to assist more. I set the intention to "get in there". I went in close to the student and hugged her body try to get her weight to shift a bit more forward over her hips, by pulling her weight out of her feet. She was a student I knew well, and I felt she would appreciate the help. Well, she shifted her weight, and then got off balance. While trying to help her not fall, and to keep her body from falling over, my hand ending up right in her groin area. I didn't know whether to acknowledge that I touched her there, or just pretend it didn't happen and keep going forward with the assist. I ended up saying I'm sorry, and moving forward, which I think was the right thing to do at the time. I don't believe she was offended. I, however, thought about the incident for days. I felt terrible.
Ohhh, I thought about the bad assist for days afterward. I was worried that she felt uncomfortable, worried that she had a bad expereince. Worry, worry worry. I had a hard time talking about it. I mean, people go to yoga to relax. My fear is that she thought about it after that moment.
Now I have been a professional dancer for many years, and I have changed in many quick changes backstage, and certainly have lost all my modesty when it comes to people seeing my naked body, or accidental touches during partnering and streching excercises. I just don't have the sensor but I know that some people do.
I just have to remember that, while teachers are their to share information, most of the time, the teacher is the one that learns from the students. If I had to do it again, I would have asked her, "are you OK", and then kept going with the assist. And also, I want to be humble about assists. I need to keep in mind that the student know exactly what to do. Most of us were upside down all the time when we were younger, and as teacher, we must guide them to find that playful part of themselves. Create an environment of safety and fun, and yoga class can be a place to discover who you are and what your body is capable of. If the teacher has that intention, than the student will feel better in the safe space created by the teacher.
