One thing studying yoga has taught me is to look past the paradigms of black/white, good/bad, etc. But, I know when a class is going great, and now also when I am having a plain bad class. I had taught three or four classes when I had a class in which the energy was just .... i'll say zippy. There were about three or students who had never taken yoga, so there was the challenge of keeping the poses basic enough for them. The problem arouse because in my mind, I had a complete plan of doing a VINYASA FLOW CLASS, and it was difficult, ahem, to flow, with beginner students. I basically had to do a beginners workshop with the class, which is helpful to every student, even those who consider themselves to be advanced. But beyond this changing plan, my i-pod didn't work, the CD they had at the place was horrible, then began skipping, then when I shut the music off all together, the outside gym was playing music circa Ibiza 1998. Sigh.
I think my problem was two-fold. I was hell-bent on a plan. Second, I was insecure because I was so attached to the class being "good". There was one student, who seemed, angry, and left the class for a few minutes. I tried very hard not to internalize it all, that she was mad at the class, at the music...well, lets just say the mind was spinning out of control.
It took me a few minutes to get it together, practice what I was preaching (literally I had add some pranayama breaths during the class for my own benefit), and finish the class with my drishti towards the goal. The goal being = finding the flow and holding back my judgements. It felt good to get my very first class out of the way, and in the same thread, it felt good to survive a zippy, weird energy, teacher challenging- kind of class behind me as well.
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